Twins

There were these twins named Joe and John. Joe was the owner of an old wrecked-up boat, and John had a wife. It just so happened that the day Joe’s boat sank, John’s wife died. A few days later, an old lady met Joe on the street, and, mistaking him for John, she said, "I’m so sorry for your loss."

Joe said, "Oh, hell, no. The thing is I’m sort of glad to be rid of her. She was a rotten old thing from the beginning. Her bottom was all shriveled up, and she smelt like dead fish. She was always losing her water. She had a bad crack in the back, and a pretty big hole in the front, too. The hole got bigger every time I used her; she leaked like crazy, and it got to be too hard to keep her upright. But, what really finished her off were the four tough guys who rented her for a good time. I warned them she wasn’t any good, but they wanted to have her anyway. The fools all tried to get on her at the same time, and it was too much for the old girl. While they where trying to get in their various positions, she split right up the middle!"

The old woman fainted.

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